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Friday, April 5, 2013

“Mis-en-Place Index, Part XLV: Everybody has to get his or her Tartar Sauce before the Public and this one is the absolute Best anywhere in the Entire State of California!” by Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki


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Today’s album is Frank Zappa’s fifty-third solo album, “Imaginary Diseases,” which came out in 2006 and was once again another stellar album in the ongoing posthumous releases of Mr. Frank Zappa!  As always, we urge our readership to visit Amazon.com—the world’s largest online department store!—so you can buy it so please!  Go there now, pick it up, enjoy, and then leave us a note telling us how much you enjoyed it!  Thanks for your patronage!                         





SATURDAY, APRIL 06, 2013

 

THE NEW AGE—TWO YEARS UNTIL THE NEXT ELECTION ARRIVES!

 

 

 
 
 
STINKBUG 2013
 
 
 

 



Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki

END Commentary 04-06-2013

Copyright © 2012 by MHB Productions

Word Count: 2,580.

 

AMERICAN INSTITUTE OF CULINARY POLITICS

 

ELEMENTALNEWSOFTHEDAY.BLOGSPOT.COM-STINKBUG—THE HEADLINES

Elemental News of the Day Commentary-Opinion-Sports-Foodservice for           Saturday, April 06, 2013 by Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki



MIS-EN-PLACE INDEX, PART XLV



Mis-en-Place Index, Part XLV: Everybody has to get his or her Tartar Sauce before the Public and this one is the absolute Best anywhere in the Entire State of California!” by Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki



867th BLOGPOST AT THE AICP-END!
Ralph Emerson Bailey, Jr., Inebriated Idiot, Bakersfield, CA

Bakersfield, CA, 04-06-2013 S:  I love Saturdays as it means but one more day to go and then I am out the door, gone, sayonara, and all of that stuff.  Welcome to the weekend edition of the American Institute of Culinary Politics-Elemental News of the Day, the place where we do our thing on a 24/7/365 basis.  Did you know that currently, we are in trouble with Facebook and that is WHY we are currently not leaving any posts?  It seems that they dropped a major punishment on Brian Carrick, our esteemed publisher and contributor for “inviting” too many of our friends from our personal Facebook pages to participate at the blog’s Facebook page.  They slapped a fourteen day suspension upon him to which, he said, “I am not signing the thing that says I did something wrong, I did nothing wrong—it’s Facebook who sent me the invites in the first place!”  Unless he immediately signs a confessional admitting that he is done wrong in the eyes of the social network site, he may lose all of his privileges as well as the blog’s Facebook page.  We need all of our fans to protest what they have done to both him and to us because if one is innocent, there is absolutely NO way to speak to a representative from the networking site to plead one’s case.  I say, “Screw Facebook, they’re a bunch of pricks!”
Facebook Creator Mark Zuckerberg

We are thinking of creating our own Social Networking site so people can freely express ideas back and forth.  It makes one sick when one follows the rules of a site such as Facebook religiously only to be slapped down because someone sends invitations to others to join up with them.  What is wrong about it is the fact that people say all sorts of mean, hateful things to one another or about others so why in God’s name do they feel “threatened” from an invite?  I think someone needs to tell Mr. Zuckerberg to man up and quit behaving like a pansy because way worse things go on at Facebook daily than anywhere else.   Our site is based upon helping raise the consciousness of folks working in the culinary arts industry, not to harm anyone, slander anyone, or cause them emotional problems and yet, when we send invites to people—that were sent to us by Facebook themselves!—we get punished for being “threatening.”
Talk Show Host Jaz McKay

 What is wrong with people today, that on the one hand, they are so sensitive, so pansy-like while on the other hand, they can be so hateful, extremely malicious, and unkind?  Sure, we criticize the bombastic idiot, Ralph Emerson Bailey, Jr., the farcical talk show host in Bakersfield, California, that now belches his opinions at AM 1180 Talk Radio in this town.  We attack him off-and-on because he is (1) a public figure (2) a liar (3) a drunken lout, and (4) makes everyone sick.  When you see a public figure like Mr. Bailey lurching from table to table at all of the best eateries in town, bumming drinks, slurring his words, and then portraying himself as ‘holier than thou,’ the man deserves to be slammed and we are just the ones to do the slamming!  It is fine to criticize a fool until one runs out of words as he put himself into that category by trying to appear to be some sort of politically-savvy guru when in fact, he is nothing more than a bum.  He tries to act like Doctor Benjamin Carson, the noted black brain surgeon who operates on children when he is nothing more than an inebriated fool is—that is why we go after the idiot, as should all of you! 
Talk Show IDIOT RALPH BAILEY

Today, I am going to make a tartar sauce recipe, one from the Stockdale Country Club that long ago, I had the opportunity to learn from my good friend, Stinkbug.  Everyone alive who is a chef of any stature tends to have all of his or her own recipes as without them, he or she is nothing more than another fast food smuck trying to be a real “chef.”  If ever there was anything more infuriating, it is someone who attempts to make himself better than his peers do or worse, better than everyone, you know, someone like that unintelligent ignoramus, Ralph Bailey.  The man swears he is educated but if that is so, why does he sound like such a doddering dolt, I have no explanation.  Sure, it’s beginning to sound like a slugfest, let’s attack-a-local-talk-show-host-day,” I know how it sounds and how you feel.  All I can say is that I hope they fire the man from Kern 1180 Radio just as they did him over at the sizzling number one talk show station in town, AM 1560 Radio, the best of the best anywhere in Kern County.  We continually promote the Jaz McKay Talk Show around the clock hoping that with our reach, we can turn him into a nationwide talk show—that would be something!
Talk Show Host Ed Schultz

Okay, we are going to make our tartar sauce now, it’s a good one, which is important in this business when most of the competition tends to buy cases of four gallons of tartar sauce each because they lack the ability or the funds to make a good one!   It really is not that hard but nowadays, the young wonder cooks seem to lack the ability and the intelligence to make not only satisfactory products but also the BEST products throughout their region or area.  That is why we do what we do here on a daily basis; we are trying to educate the world, not only about fools like Ralph Bailey, someone whom I would suggest that Ed Schultz on MSNBC is far better.  I mean, if you equate “Sergeant Schultz” as being better than someone that, my friends, is the coup d’ gras for that individual’s career because Ed Schultz is lower than herpes!

We had better look at the recipe because I am beginning to think that I could go on the entire day trashing Mr. Bailey and Ed Schultz so here it is in all of its infinite glory, delicious, beautiful, and easy to make!  What is better than that!

(#0399) TARTAR SAUCE #3

 


One of the benefits of working with many different chefs is the fact that one gets a wonderful opportunity to see a wide variety of similar products prepared in numerous ways.  Tartar sauce, cocktail sauce, and sandwich spreads are all basic prepmaster or pantry sauces and yet, infinite ways to prepare them abound.  This is a great sauce, perfect for home use or for expansion, so give it a shot and see what you think; I guarantee you are going to love it!
Yield:  about 3.125 cups / Mis-en-place: 20 minutes:
 

 


Qty.
Measure
Item
Other
2.5
Cups
Mayonnaise
 
.25
Cup
Dill relish
 
.25
Cup
Capers with juice
 
.25
Cup
Minced yellow onions
Blanched
1.5
Teaspoons
Lemon juice
 
.5
Teaspoon
Kosher salt
 
.25
Teaspoon
White pepper
 
1
Tablespoon
Freshly minced parsley flakes
Rinsed and dried

 


Method:

1.     Mis-en-place: have everything ready with which to work! Combine the ingredients in the bowl of an electric mixer equipped with a WHIP attachment.  Blend slowly, rotating the implement on low speed, until you have combined the ingredients.
2.     Scrape down the sides of the bowl and shake the whip and then slowly rotate the attachment around the bowl once again for another minute or so; then, taste and readjust the seasonings per taste and if satisfied, scrape the mixture into a sanitized airtight container.  Attach the lid, label, date, and keep refrigerated at ALL times and use within 5-7 days at most.  NEVER return used amounts to the parent batch lest you possibly cause foodborne illness from doing so.  Store leftover amounts in brand new containers, and then label and date, too.
This is a good tartar sauce, one that has always been popular, due both to its simplicity and its flavor; therefore, keep the recipe handy, as you will use it repeatedly, it is that good.  It is important that every chef alive have his or her own personalized sauces and those they keep them to themselves, doing them in their own personal code.  They have to do this so avaricious and greedy employees cannot steal them and then sell them to the highest bidder or take one’s job away from them because they know the recipes and will do it for less.   Stuff like that does happen more often than not and nowadays in this time of economic trouble, societal upheavals, and other problematic events, one has to watch his or her back ALL the time!
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HALLOWEEN

As always, we have a great time around here and that is why we want all of you to become a part of the organization by submitting articles to us for inspection and full-credit.  It is a great thing if you would do this, as it is a symbiotic relationship: we give you the space to share your recipes and in return, you send us more and more people who will become dedicated followers of the END.  Currently of multi-diversity across the Internet, it is important that we hear the voices of more and more people from all walks of the foodservice profession —join us. We urge our readership to write to us, leave comments, and if there are any of you, who would care to write an article for us, please get in touch via Magnolia Hilltop Brewers, P.O. Box 20669, Bakersfield, CA 93390-0669.  We obviously do not pay anything but give YOU full byline and that, my friends, is worth its weight in gold.  We want as many people who want to write to be able to do so and we believe that by presenting a forum for our fellow chefs, we are doing something for our beloved industry.  We love diversity and hope to add new and different authors to our pantheon of chefs, food and beverage directors, and culinary professionals.  Come on and join us, it will be fun! Expect that when all of us have run through our cycle, we will be introducing some brand-new talent or so Stinky says.

 
JOE’S CORSAGE

          We have touted the AARC Technology Company here in Bakersfield, CA, and must add the Nerds on Call.com folks.  Without them keeping our blog up-and-running, there is no telling where we would be now.  We have a great many problematic issues here at the AICP-END because even with the best security systems in the world, malware and other terrible fecal materials manage to penetrate the blogsite.  Do yourself a favor, hire the best, and note, you can have online help via a remote button on your desktop for just $25 per month!  Get in contact with the Nerds now!

 

JOE’S DOMAGE

          We are selling recipes all the time and you can order things you would like copies of simply by mailing us your name, address, the recipe you would like and a check for $1.00.  You can buy an entire week’s worth of recipes when we do a series simply by sending us a check or money order (no cash please!) for $20 and we will have it out to you in the next day’s mail.  Please become a part of the AICP-END by sending us your names, addresses, and information and we will welcome all of you with open arms!

 
QUADIOPHILIAC

          To buy paintings, recipes, or full article series, please send us your information by mailing us at P.O. Box #20669, Bakersfield, CA, 93309-0669.  You can call about paintings at 661-834-5185; we will take all calls and provide to you as much information as is available.  It is time that we begin taking the next step and to immortalize Beverly Carrick for eternity and begin moving towards the establishment of a website of our own! God bless each single one of you amongst our fan base!

 
JOE’S X-MASSAGE

          I failed to mention something I found to be highly entertaining last week and that is the fact that Los Angeles County finally admitted something known everywhere: ankle monitors to track criminals are worthless.  I mean, who in their right mind ever thought that the technical way of doing things when it comes to tracking criminals would truly work?  I for one knew from the start that when some convict leaves prison or the county jail that he or she is going to cut that sucker off before 24 hours go by, of that, there’s no doubt, look at the statistics!   I think the only person that would NOT cut his electronic monitor off, it’d be Ralph Bailey, if that smuck was arrested for a second time, taken to jail, sent to the bust-busters’ cell block and finally released—with an electronic tracking device—that ignorant fool would be the only one still wearing it!  Now you know, that’s pretty damned sad, I am sorry, when someone does what the law tells him he must do and then does it, that person is nothing but a lowlife, bonehead that deserves to be doing talk radio on Guam—sorry Guamanians, I did not mean to personally insult YOU, just Mr. Bailey!                      

 
IMAGINARY DISEASES

Anyhow, let us close with this impassioned plea—please leave some comments and/or become a follower and why not spend some money and purchase an album by Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention and/or buy a cookbook from Amazon.com—we want to make some money here so help us out by buying something!  Allied with them, we are pleased to market their merchandise!  Amazon.com is one of the greatest—if not the ultimate greatest!—online department stores in which, one can find almost everything on the planet.  We love them and they love us and we want all of you to visit them daily, take advantage of their deals on everything from kitchen equipment to cookbooks, CDs, DVDs, and everything else a person could want.  Everything you buy from them puts money into our pockets, which allows us to keep this fine blog up-and-running 24/7/365!  God bless America and God bless Amazon.com!

Thank you, my friends!

B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki

B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki

Certified Working Chef, AAC, ACF
This is I back in the 1960's when I was a young sous chef working in a local hotel in Laguna Beach, California. I always loved to cook and apprenticed as a young man which is what most of have done who write for the Elemental News of the Day. We share a love for the culinary world and do our best to share that love with you. We hope you enjoy it! Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki writes from Valencia, California.

Chef B.H. “BC” Cznystekinki is a Conservative Republican.
 

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The AICP-END Commentary for Saturday, April 06, 2013 by Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki

 

 

Please note that everyone who writes for the Elemental News of the Day is their own person entitled to their own opinions, attitudes, and insanity so does not necessarily speak for all of us.  Thanks, Stinkbug.

REFERENCES:

The one-and-only Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki wrote this original essay.

 

Recipe created by Chef B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki on May 03, 1979 in Valencia, CA.

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♂TODAY: CHEF B.H. “BC” CZNYSTEKINKI
NEXT WEEK: CHEF CHARLES SMITHENSTEIN♂
 

STINKBUG ALIVE AND WELL AND ON THE ROAD TO 2014!  
 
This is #0169, an 8” x 10" original oil painting by Beverly Carrick entitled, “Blooming Desert." It is among her more beautiful works and is available for sale. You can see much more of her work at her Website, located at http://www.beverlycarrick.com or at Brian Carrick's Facebook page. At her Website, you will see not only more original oil paintings but also lithographs, giclees, prints, miniatures, photographs, and even her award-winning instructional video entitled, "Painting the Southwest with Beverly Carrick." Beverly has been painting for more than 60 years and known around the world for both the beauty and timelessness of her artworks. Hanging in private and public galleries and followed by many fans encircling the globe—her works instill awe because of her artistic brilliance and personal beauty. We urge you to go to her Website NOW and view her work. It is possible that you will find something you like and will want to buy it for yourself, a friend, a loved one, or a neighbor! You will not be disappointed so please: do yourself a favor and go there IMMEDIATELY! Thank you, the Elemental News of the Day!

Beverly Carrick: the World’s Greatest Artist (1927-2012)!

Pictures #0000-0395

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CAVEAT:

NOTE: EVERYONE WHO WRITES FOR THE ELEMENTAL NEWS OF THE DAY DOES SO UNDER AN ALIAS DUE TO FREQUENT OPINIONS THAT MIGHT NOT ALWAYS BE ACCEPTABLE AT THEIR PLACES OF EMPLOYMENT. PLEASE NOTE, TOO, THAT RECIPES ARE BROKEN DOWN FROM INSTITUTIONAL SIZES, WHICH MEANS THEY DO NOT ALWAYS TRANSLATE PROPERLY AND SEEN AS SUCH.  THANK YOU, Moses Scharbug III.

 

 

 

The above icon is the “Trademark of Quality and Symbol of Integrity/Logo” of the Magnolia Hilltop Brewers and of What's Cookin' Productions. This article is copyrighted © 03-29-2013, all rights reserved. Unauthorized reproductions of anything on this blog site, including written material and photographs, are permissible unless granted in writing by Moses Scharbug or Stinkbug. Thank you, the Elemental News of the Day.

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Assistant Publisher: Roland Carl Davis

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Beer: Smokehouse

Board of Directors: Garfield H. Johnson, Alvin T. Woliztnikistein, B. Carrick, B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki, Elmer K. “the Hooter” Hootenstein, Gervais Krinkelmeier, Goldie “Goldfish” McNamara, James “Jimmy” Hall, James, “JT” Tobiason, Kilgore Randalini, Lilah Paulikovich, Murph MacDougal, and Olaf Bologolo,

 

 

 

 

NOTE FROM MOSES SCHARBUG III, ASSISTANT EDITOR:

Okay, that is going to do it for today, friends, so now, let us move on to the closing words we normally share with you every day: please, I suggest you save these recipes by bookmarking them online or by writing to us and telling, us which recipes you would like mailed to you.  Each one costs $1.50, a dollar for the recipe and $0.50 for the shipping.  If you buy all three, simply enclose a check or money order for $3.00 otherwise, it is more expensive for just a single recipe.  Be sure to tell us the number of the recipe in which, you are interested so we can ship it to you posthaste!  Thank you for your interest and if you wish, $10.00 will get you ONE week’s worth of recipes, starting on Monday and going through Sunday.  Should you wish the entire Special Menus Index 2011 Easter Brunch Menu’s recipes, simply send us $25.00 and you will get every recipe sent to you via USPS First Class Mail.  International orders take U.S. Money Orders! Moses Scharbug III, Assistant Editor.

 

 

 
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Tags:

B. H. “BC” Cznystekinki, the Mothers of Invention, Frank Zappa, Condiments, Tasty Foods, Mis-en-Place, Mis-en-Place 101, Seafood and Shellfish, Tartar Sauces, Seafood Accompaniments, Mayonnaise Sauces,

 
Trademark of Quality c/o the Elemental News of the Day and Magnolia Hilltop Brewers Productions 2013 of Bakersfield, California, the United States of America.

 

 

THANK YOU MARY LOU GUNN FOR TERMINATING RALPH BAILEY, JR. AND FOR GIVING US MARK LEVIN AT HIS PROPER TIME, 3:00 P.M. MONDAY-FRIDAY!

 

NOTE—WE SUPPORT JAZ MCKAY AND MR. PUCK OF KNZR 1560 A.M. RADIO IN BAKERSFIELD, CA, BECOMING A SYNDICATED, NATIONWIDE RADIO SHOW! THE MAN IS ONE OF THE ALL-TIME GREATS AND DESERVES TO BE RECOGNIZED FOR HIS CONTRIBUTIONS TO TALK RADIO, THE CONSERVATIVE CAUSE, AND PLAIN COMMON SENSE! THANK YOU!

 

PLEASE LISTEN TO KAOI 1110 AM and 96.7 FM ON MAUI, HAWAII—YOU CAN CATCH IT ONLINE OR LIVE ON THE RADIO! THEY COVER CONSERVATIVE TOPICS WITH THE EXCEPTION OF ED SCHULTZ AND THE NFL!

 

Listen to KFI AM Radio 640 out Of Los Angeles, California 9:00 A.M. to 12 Noon—the Station Chef BC tunes into every day!

 

 

 

 

 

CHEF B.H. “BC” CZNYSTEKINKI
 MADE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA! WE SUPPORT THE MILITARY OF THE UNITED STATES AND THAT OF ITS ALLIES AROUND THE GLOBE!

 

Thank you for joining me today at the New Elemental News of the Day, I appreciate your company and hope that you bring your friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, and relatives the next time you visit!

 

 

 
BUYIMAGINARY DISEASESBY FRANK ZAPPA AT AMAZON.COM NOW!

 

 

The Chef’s Culinary Nightmare: Our Muse…

 

 

 

 

Beverly Carrick Original Paintings Price List:

 

  1. Size 36” x 72”…………………………………………………………. $18,000.00.
  2. Size 40” x 60”…………………………………………………………. $15,450.00.
  3. Size 36” x 48”…………………………………………………………. $11,500.00.
  4. Size 30” x 40”…………………………………………………………. $ 9,900.00.
  5. Size 24” x 48”…………………………………………………………. $ 9,000.00.
  6. Size 24” x 36”…………………………………………………………. $ 8,240.00.
  7. Size 24” x 30”…………………………………………………………$ 7,600.00.
  8. Size 20” x 24”…………………………………………………………$ 5,950.00.
  9. Size 18” x 24”…………………………………………………………$ 5,950.00.
  10. Size 16” x 20”…………………………………………………………$ 5,400.00.
  11. Size 12” x 24” …....................................................................................$ 5,400.00.
  12. Size 12” x 16”….....................................................................................$ 4,500.00.
  13. Size 11” x 14”…………………………………………………………$ 4,500.00.
  14. Size 9” x 12” …………………………………………………………. $ 1,200.00.
  15. Size 8” x 10” …………………………………………………………. $ 1,000.00.


GUN SALESMAN OF THE YEAR: PRESIDENT BARACK H. OBAMA!

TODAY IN HISTORY—APRIL 06, 2013:

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