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Saturday, April 13, 2013

“Classic Quickbreads and Muffins, Part XCIII: The Week concludes with the Chef returning to Muffins one Last Time: Orange Muffins II, better than the Rest of the Chefs Combined!” by Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein


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Today’s album is Frank Zappa’s sixty-first solo album, “the Lumpy Money Project-Object,” which came out in 2009 and was another fine gem from Mr. Zappa’s vault!  As always, we urge our readership to visit Amazon.com—the world’s largest online department store!—so you can buy it so please!  Go there now, pick it up, enjoy, and then leave us a note telling us how much you enjoyed it!  Thanks for your patronage!                         



 

SUNDAY, APRIL 14, 2013

 

THE NEW AGE—TWO YEARS UNTIL THE NEXT ELECTION ARRIVES!

 

 

 
 
 
STINKBUG 2013
 
 
 

 



Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein

END Commentary 04-14-2013

Copyright © 2012 by MHB Productions

Word Count: 3,383.

 

AMERICAN INSTITUTE OF CULINARY POLITICS

 

ELEMENTALNEWSOFTHEDAY.BLOGSPOT.COM-STINKBUG—THE HEADLINES

Elemental News of the Day Commentary-Opinion-Sports-Foodservice for           Sunday, April 14, 2013 by Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein



CLASSIC QUICKBREADS AND MUFFINS, PART XCIII



Classic Quickbreads and Muffins, Part XCIII: The Week concludes with the Chef returning to Muffins one Last Time: Orange Muffins II, better than the Rest of the Chefs Combined!” by Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein

 

875th BLOGPOST AT THE AICP-END!

Orange Muffins II

Bakersfield, CA, 04-14-2013 Su: Here we are, Sunday, the final day of our week and then tomorrow, the best chef of the bunch, Chef Pedro Munoz, enters the back door while I hit the road—not to return for SIX months or more!  No one ever considers the fact that all of us are professional business individuals, that we either work for others or run our own establishments so taking time out of our busy schedules to either spend time working on our recipes, posts, and other assorted obligations either from afar or here on site can prove challenging.  Then to add our commentary, our insights on the things that go on in the world around us—like this crap with solar energy and Galkos Construction, Inc., one of the worst examples of crookedness in the world of alternative energy takes a great deal of time.  I am still amazed at the situation that is taking place with my friend’s mother out in Shafter where Jeff Lennon, the individual that came to her home and signed her up, is allowed to continue doing what he’s doing.  It shocks the hell out of me that in this day and age, virtually every politician tells us that we need to find other forms of energy takes into account that all of it is based upon fraudulent science, it is horrifying!   Yet, we have an administration and a President who is intent on shoving this crap into not only us but also our kids and grandkids attending school, it makes you want to move to Brazil, Belize, or some such other place free from this time of bullcrap.  Whatever happened to the Republicans of the 1980’s, even the 1990’s, where are they when we need them but instead we have fools like all of these Tea Party folks, they are ruining the party as are the Evangelicals, the anti-abortion crowd, and the talk radio idiots!  
Galkos Construction Co., Inc.

Enough of Galkos, GCI,” you can find more about them online, there are plenty of reviews on the first page when you pull them up, none of them very complimentary, and that should have been where my friend’s mother went first.  The problem as I said was that she was in her late eighties and when Mr. Lennon strode up the table and pulled out all of his brochures, he mesmerized her and her husband.  He was the kind of sales representative one would want if he were trying to sell a polluted property because he could sell it with answers for every question and then some no one has thought about.  I have to give credit where credit’s due because I wish I had him working for me back when I was working in a hotel that served nothing but questionable food when I was a young chef—he could have taken the rap!
Secretary of Health and Human Services, Kathleen Sibelius

Next year, friends, it’s going to be a dreadful time and you know what, I think the Secretary of Health, Welfare, and whatever else, Kathleen Sibelius should hire Mr. Lennon to sell the Affordable Care Act to the employees of the nation.  If he went out there, acting as the Chief Navigator, that man could sell horse crap to the Pope and he’d buy it willingly.  Did you know that if someone offers insurance to his or her employees and ONE employee cannot afford it, has to go to the State Exchange and purchase a different plan, that the employer has to make all of his plans cost what it cost the single employee?  If he or she can’t do that, he has to pay a minimum fine of $2,000 per each employee, not just the one who had to go elsewhere AND make his or her plans equal to or less than what the one person bought.  Who the hell sat down and figured this crap out, but let me tell you, if you look at the book, “The Obamacare Survival Guide,” virtually every statute or law mentioned leads one to look at other laws.  Most things say, “as the secretary (Sebelius) shall decide.”  What does that mean, I am almost afraid to ask, it’s as if they are figuring it out as they go, talk to your insurance person—candidly—and they will tell you that they are ALL afraid of what’s coming next year, it’s not going to be good!
The “Inbred” Kim Jung-Un, North Korean Dictator

This year is sort of like the antebellum years prior to the Civil War in which, everyone went about thinking nothing really wrong could happen, that war would truly not break out, sort of like what we are going through with the North Koreans.  The inbred is always talking about annihilating the South, the US, Japan, and anyone else who gets in his way.  That is sort of, what the folks prior to the War between the States went through in the late 1850’s up to the outbreak of war in 1861.  Everyone goes about acting as though nothing can wrong, you know, whistling through the graveyard, hoping the spooks don’t jump out and steal your soul.   What is our nation coming to, friends, I have absolutely no idea whatsoever, all I am thinking about is when it is I am going to retire for good and move out of the country.  Later this year, we are taking our vacation down to Belize as I would like to see what the only English-speaking Latin American country has to offer me and my family, enough’s enough, it’s time to get out of this rapidly deteriorating nation!
The Flag of Belize

I am glad it’s Sunday because we can part on this sunny note, something to leave you thinking about as you ponder my final recipe of the week.  I am giving you another recipe for Orange Muffins, something we’ve done here before and most likely will do again as all of us have our own individual ideas about muffin-making.  We also have a communal kitchen here at our corporate offices in beautiful downtown Oildale, California, on Robert’s Lane, in between the trailer parks and the Big C Market.  We tend to spend a lot of time perfecting our recipes and then going to the local bars for most of the night, something that is difficult to do back on our normal jobs.  Here’s my recipe, I do believe that all of you are going to fall in love with it! 
(#0003-A) ORANGE MUFFINS II

 

One thing about serious baking, one tends always to seek ways to improve their existing recipes, to improve those of others, or to see how far they can stretch their ingredients, thereby improving profit and increasing quantities.  That is the story with this recipe, when I originally created it years ago, it produced about nine, maybe ten muffins if I massaged it; yet, it was never quite as great as I hoped it would be so I commenced doing scientific study on baked goods.  This muffin recipe is one of those ones people remember forever, especially currently of people either buying frozen batters or worse, buying box mixes and claiming the finished products as their “own.” Nothing is more shameful than taking credit for someone else’s formulations and then calling them “my creation” when everyone else competing for the same foodservice dollars is using the same things.  Be inventive and individual and you, my friend, will become the best baker in not only your town or city but in your locale and quite possibly your state!
Yield:  12 medium (3/8-cup) or 18 small (0.25-cup)  / Mis-en-place: 45-50 minutes:
 

 


Qty.
Measure
Item
Other
2
Cups
All-purpose flour
 
1
Cup
Cake flour
 
1-1/3
Tablespoons
Baking powder
 
1
Tablespoon
Nonfat dry milk
 
1
Tablespoon
Bob’s Red Mill soy flour
 
1.5
Teaspoons
Baking soda
 
.75
Teaspoon
Salt
 
.125
Cup
Orange zest
 
1
Cup
Finely-grated walnuts
Optional
1
Large
AA egg
 
1
Cup
Granulated sugar
 
3/8
Cup
Vegetable oil
 
2
Medium
Valencia oranges (zested, pith removed, pureed; puree = 1 cup wet
1
Tablespoon
 Torani’s orange syrup
 
2
Teaspoons
Orange emulsion
 
1
Teaspoon
Vanilla extract
 
.25
Teaspoon
Eggshade food color
 
Optional:
.5
Cup
Drawn butter
OPTIONAL
The Finish:
1.25
Cups
Powdered sugar
 
1
Teaspoon
Vanilla extract
 
1
Teaspoon
Orange emulsion
 
1-2
Tablespoons
Orange juice
 

 


Method:
1.     Mis-en-place: have everything ready with which to work! Prepare your muffin pans first by selecting NOTHING but reflective bakeware such as stainless steel or heavy-duty aluminum pans.  Spray them heavily with PAM Baking Spray, Crisco Pan Release, or some such other food release spray.  Then, line them with either paper baking cups or aluminum, whichever you have, and then spray BOTH the cups and the top(s) of the pan(s) heavily with food release spray, too.  This helps ease the de-panning process as well as for the diners easily to remove the liners without tearing their muffins apart.  When you have prepared your pan(s), set them aside until needed.
2.     Put a pot of water atop the stove and have near boiling.  In addition to this, preheat your oven, standard: 375°F or convection (with the fan “off” for now) to 325°F.  Prepare the ingredients listed under the “Finish” and set aside: this is your glaze.  In addition to this, prepare the orange puree by first zesting two medium pieces of fruit and then removing ALL of the pith.  Then, place the bare-naked fruit into your Cuisinart and puree.  Finally, if you wish to baste the finished muffins with drawn butter after pulling them from the oven, prepare it now by melting one cup of cold butter over a very low flame.  When it liquefies, draw off the fat that rises to the top, and then remove the clear liquid using a ladle, and finally, stop when you hit the watery whey remaining at the bottom.  (Note: you can save this for use in enriching yeast breads so label, date it, and keep it frozen until use).
3.     Double-sift the first SEVEN ingredients then stir in the zest and if using the nuts, add them, too.  Set this aside until needed. 
4.     Next, hook up your Kitchen Aid mixer or your Hobart and attach the PADDLE attachment.  Begin beating the egg(s) with the granulated sugar at medium high speed and as you do so, begin beating in the oil, slowly, as you dribble it in along the sides of the bowl.  When you have CREAMED the mixture, add the remaining ingredients, blending well. 
5.     Now, add the DRY to the WET by slowly rotating the paddle until the former has been moistened the latter.  Do this slowly, taking care not to overmix as if you do, this can cause the flour’s gluten to overdevelop thereby leading to a chewier finished product: not professional!  
6.     When combined, cover the bowl with plastic wrap and rest it for ten minutes.  Meanwhile, place a small pan on the oven floor and pour in about an inch of water.  Allow the steam to bathe the over but be sure to retain some of the water for dipping your ice cream scoop when you fill the muffin cups.
7.     When time is up, stir the batter with a metal spoon, then scrape down both the sides and if the paddle is still there, scrape it, too, then remove and send it to the sink.  Using the ice cream scoop—occasionally dipped in warm water—fill the cups ALMOST to their rims but not quite.  Gently shake the pan(s), and then place on the middle oven rack(s) avoiding both the uppermost and bottommost shelves, as heat tends to concentrate in these two areas.  If using the convection oven, flip the switch to “on” now and after five minutes, pull out any residual water and discard it. 
8.     Check the muffins at 24 minutes for standard or 18 for convection.  Normally, we know our ovens so if the muffins appear jiggly, do NOT pull the shelf or the pan(s) toward you; however, if the muffins appear firm, tentatively touch them to see if they feel solid.  If they do, then touch the middle row(s) and if they seem firm, insert a paring knife or a cake tester into the middle row(s) of muffins and if it withdraws “clean,” meaning “dry,” they need to come out NOW!
9.     If not, continue baking until they are as described above, then pull the pan(s) out, place them atop cooling rack(s) and cool for 1-2 minutes.  If you wish to give them even more softness and the flavor of butter, brush them gently with the drawn butter NOW.  Do not apply the butter heavily; just give them a gently brushing.  Then, gently rap the pan(s) to loosen them and then finally, de-pan them using a butter knife if necessary and leave them atilt in their cups. 
10. After several more minutes, remove them completely from their pan(s), place them directly atop the cooling rack(s) and begin glazing them with your prepared glaze.  Using a whisk or a spoon, drizzle over and across them so that it coats them and does so decoratively, make it beautiful! 
11. To serve, place them atop a doily-lined tray, present the tray with whipped butter and preserves of choice.  If to be used later on the same day, keep out at room temperature covered with wax paper.  If to be used the following day, wrap them with plastic wrap and either freeze and defrost the next day but do your best not to refrigerate them as the lack of humidity in most fridges tends to dry baked goods out, not something that is attractive or professional. 
12. Always individually, wrap leftovers in plastic wrap, then zip up tight in Ziploc Freezer Bags, label, date, and keep frozen until needed.  Freshness tends to peter out after seven days frozen so use them well within that time or cut them up for use in bread puddings. 
a.     NOTE: if you use the nuts, you may have thirteen, possibly fourteen muffins instead of the promised twelve.
Everyone loves orange muffins, generally, you find these or blueberry muffins on Sunday brunches so keep this recipe handy in your personal notebooks.  That is how most of us began our careers, at least back in the days when chefs made their own products and seldom bought goods outside their own kitchens.  I urge all of you to send for the week’s recipes, it’s a great way to build your recipe collections and to become the chef you can become and so keep your job in this day and age of hiring illegal aliens to not only pick our produce but to cook our meals, too.  What a recipe for disaster!
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JOE’S MÉNAGE

          Okay, we had a wonderful week, I will return in six months—if I am still living in the United States, that is—but then, if I am living in Belize or in the Falklands or somewhere like that, it might be fun to return to the USA and see the disaster unfolding around us.  Do not forget that the federal government is currently buying all of the ammunition so it can clamp down hard on any turmoil in the streets in 2014.  I expect at some point that they are going to come for everyone’s guns and that will be the end of the nation as we know it.  Most of the time, I am a RINO, I think that the moderates of my party can still sway the nation but then on occasions, they do stuff I cannot stand and that is how I feel today.  I think that John McCain would have been a good president but then, he picked the ditz Sarah Palin and she sunk his ship.  Oh, well, call me crazy, I feel the way I do because I am a prisoner of the 24-hour news cycle.  See you all in six months and remember to buy the recipes, you will be glad you did! Adios!                               

 
THE LUMPY MONEY PROJECT-OBJECT

Anyhow, let us close with this impassioned plea—please leave some comments and/or become a follower and why not spend some money and purchase an album by Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention and/or buy a cookbook from Amazon.com—we want to make some money here so help us out by buying something!  Allied with them, we are pleased to market their merchandise!  Amazon.com is one of the greatest—if not the ultimate greatest!—online department stores in which, one can find almost everything on the planet.  We love them and they love us and we want all of you to visit them daily, take advantage of their deals on everything from kitchen equipment to cookbooks, CDs, DVDs, and everything else a person could want.  Everything you buy from them puts money into our pockets, which allows us to keep this fine blog up-and-running 24/7/365!  God bless America and God bless Amazon.com!

Thank you!

Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein

Charles Smithenstein
Restaurant Manager, Mixologist, Foodserver, and Cook

 
This is a photo of me back in 1973 while being the Food and Beverage Director at one of the hotels in Bakersfield, CA, located on Union Avenue. I was in my late 30's at the time. I am still working at one of the local hotels in the nearby town of Delano, CA, a place that has been my home for the past 10 years. Our city has experienced marvelous growth and is fast becoming a player in county politics.

Chef Charles Smithenstein writes from Delano, California. 

Chef Charles Smithenstein is a liberal Republican (some call him a ‘RINO’).

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The AICP-END Commentary for Sunday, April 14, 2013 by Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein

 

 

Please note that everyone who writes for the Elemental News of the Day is their own person entitled to their own opinions, attitudes, and insanity so does not necessarily speak for all of us.  Thanks, Stinkbug.

REFERENCES:

The one-and-only Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein wrote this original essay.

 

Recipe created by Chef Charles “the Chuckster” Smithenstein on January 17, 1987 in Bakersfield, CA.

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This is #0177, a 20” x 24" original oil painting by Beverly Carrick entitled, “Sunset Beauty." It is among her more beautiful works and is available for sale. You can see much more of her work at her Website, located at http://www.beverlycarrick.com or at Brian Carrick's Facebook page. At her Website, you will see not only more original oil paintings but also lithographs, giclees, prints, miniatures, photographs, and even her award-winning instructional video entitled, "Painting the Southwest with Beverly Carrick." Beverly has been painting for more than 60 years and known around the world for both the beauty and timelessness of her artworks. Hanging in private and public galleries and followed by many fans encircling the globe—her works instill awe because of her artistic brilliance and personal beauty. We urge you to go to her Website NOW and view her work. It is possible that you will find something you like and will want to buy it for yourself, a friend, a loved one, or a neighbor! You will not be disappointed so please: do yourself a favor and go there IMMEDIATELY! Thank you, the Elemental News of the Day!

Beverly Carrick: the World’s Greatest Artist (1927-2012)!

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Okay, that is going to do it for today, friends, so now, let us move on to the closing words we normally share with you every day: please, I suggest you save these recipes by bookmarking them online or by writing to us and telling, us which recipes you would like mailed to you.  Each one costs $1.50, a dollar for the recipe and $0.50 for the shipping.  If you buy all three, simply enclose a check or money order for $3.00 otherwise, it is more expensive for just a single recipe.  Be sure to tell us the number of the recipe in which, you are interested so we can ship it to you posthaste!  Thank you for your interest and if you wish, $10.00 will get you ONE week’s worth of recipes, starting on Monday and going through Sunday.  Should you wish the entire Special Menus Index 2011 Easter Brunch Menu’s recipes, simply send us $25.00 and you will get every recipe sent to you via USPS First Class Mail.  International orders take U.S. Money Orders! Moses Scharbug III, Assistant Editor.

 

 

 
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CHEF CHARLES “THE CHUCKSTER” SMITHENSTEIN
MADE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA! WE SUPPORT THE MILITARY OF THE UNITED STATES AND THAT OF ITS ALLIES AROUND THE GLOBE!

 

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Beverly Carrick Original Paintings Price List:

 

  1. Size 36” x 72”…………………………………………………………. $18,000.00.
  2. Size 40” x 60”…………………………………………………………. $15,450.00.
  3. Size 36” x 48”…………………………………………………………. $11,500.00.
  4. Size 30” x 40”…………………………………………………………. $ 9,900.00.
  5. Size 24” x 48”…………………………………………………………. $ 9,000.00.
  6. Size 24” x 36”…………………………………………………………. $ 8,240.00.
  7. Size 24” x 30”…………………………………………………………$ 7,600.00.
  8. Size 20” x 24”…………………………………………………………$ 5,950.00.
  9. Size 18” x 24”…………………………………………………………$ 5,950.00.
  10. Size 16” x 20”…………………………………………………………$ 5,400.00.
  11. Size 12” x 24” …...................................................................................$ 5,400.00.
  12. Size 12” x 16”….....................................................................................$ 4,500.00.
  13. Size 11” x 14”…………………………………………………………$ 4,500.00.
  14. Size 9” x 12” …………………………………………………………. $ 1,200.00.
  15. Size 8” x 10” …………………………………………………………. $ 1,000.00.

GUN SALESMAN OF THE YEAR: PRESIDENT BARACK H. OBAMA!

 
 
 
TODAY IN HISTORY—APRIL 14, 2013:

  1. ----:

 
 
 

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