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Sunday, February 10, 2013

“Classic Quickbreads and Muffins, Part LXXIII: Chef Vladimir enters the AICP-END Kitchen Today and picks up with Part 73 of the Classic Quickbreads and Muffins Category by doing his Version of Classic Bran Muffins in an Institutional Size!” by Chef Vladimir Gdansk




Today’s album is Frank Zappa’s eighth solo album, “Zoot Allures,” which came out in 1976 and is another excellent installment in the ongoing legacy of Frank Zappa and all of the bands in which, he displayed his zany craziness.  This one is a great album and one you need to own so please take the convenient link posted above, go to Amazon.com, and buy it NOW!  Thank you for your support by buying all of your music through us!        





MONDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2013


THE NEW AGE—TWO YEARS UNTIL THE NEXT ELECTION ARRIVES!







STINKBUG 2013






Chef Vladimir Gdansk

END Commentary 02-11-2013

Copyright © 2012 by MHB Productions

Word Count: 2,240.


AMERICAN INSTITUTE OF CULINARY POLITICS


ELEMENTALNEWSOFTHEDAY.BLOGSPOT.COM-STINKBUG—THE HEADLINES

Elemental News of the Day Commentary-Opinion-Sports-Foodservice for           Monday, February 11, 2013 by Chef Vladimir Gdansk



CLASSIC QUICKBREADS AND MUFFINS, PART LXXIII


Classic Quickbreads and Muffins, Part LXXIII: Chef Vladimir enters the AICP-END Kitchen Today and picks up with Part 73 of the Classic Quickbreads and Muffins Category by doing his Version of Classic Bran Muffins in an Institutional Size!” by Chef Vladimir Gdansk


813th BLOGPOST AT THE AICP-END!



Bakersfield, CA, 02-11-2013 M: Hello, friends, it has been eons since last I was here, last July 2012, in fact!  I am happy to be here with you all again and wish I had an opportunity to comment last week on the Superbowl, XLVII, the one between the Baltimore Ravens and the San Francisco 49ers.  I am somewhat amiss to say that I believe someone, possibly even the commissioner of the National Football League through the power at the Superdome in New Orleans, Louisiana to give the San Franciscans a chance.  We have not had a blowout in a long time in any Superbowl in the past ten years and it seems to me that when the Ravens had the Niners down by a score of 28-6, the game was fast becoming a rout of monumental proportions.  The betting line alone has to have been in a major panic, as the oddsmakers did not expect the 9ers with their wonder-boy Colin Kaepernick, an exceptional quarterback no less was acting like the rookie he is and what’s more, the oppressive Ravens defense was smothering both him and his offensive line.  Then, the halftime show with that slutty ho, Beyonce and her sluts up there showing their asses like a bunch of hookers in Seattle on a Friday night put on their “performance,” if you can call it that.  Okay, could it be possible that the Superdome could not handle the power required for the show or could it be that a desperate San Francisco fan OR—I will make the accusation now—the NFL Commissioner Rodger Goodell through the power switch?  I have never seen a game like that and what’s more, when the power was halfway lit, they had more light than the Fog Bowl played years ago in the frozen tundra of the north and yet, they were told not to play.  I am sorry; to me it looked like the NFL did their best to protect both Kaepernick and the 49ers from being destroyed in one of the memorable games of my lifetime.   

I realize that some people are going to disagree with me vehemently but I am sorry, I have not lived to be as old as I am without having an opinion and every chef out there working in horrible conditions knows of where I speak.  We call it for what it is and I am sorry, there was something horribly wrong about not letting the Ravens do to the 49ers what the 49ers did to the San Diego Chargers the last time they went to the Superbowl, back in the 1990’s.  In 1995, in Superbowl XXIX, they clobbered the Chargers 49-26, which was an amazing win seeing as how the Chargers were riding high.  If what I say is true, then the NFL must fire Mr. Goodell because if the commissioner is that fricking crooked that he makes a blatant attempt to throw the game to one team over the other, then that man should be washing dishes at a Denny’s Restaurant and NOT in a position of power like what he holds. 

The other thing I would like to comment on is the fact that the world is not quite ready to have a thug quarterback like Colin Kaepernick.  Why do I call him a “thug?” I am sorry, when a guy is all tatted up like this young man, he looks like he just came out of the prison, either punking someone or being someone’s punk.  This kid has been built up, as he is the new Joe Montana or Steve Young and I am sorry, the world is not ready for a tat-man.   I do not want to see a young man with his arms covered in script, what is he going to look like next season, is he going to have a tatted tear dripping from his eye to show he lost the fricking Superbowl?  If we do not get a grip on where we are going as a culture, I am sorry, we are going to look like the natives who lost the country to the Europeans back in the 1400’s and the 1500’s.  We are going around in a cycle that is leading our nation back to the days of the Romans and I simply do not want to see my sports stars looking like felons, enough is enough, please!  Even the US Navy and the Marine Corps no longer are taking people with tattoos.

Today, we are going to do something that is different from some of the things we have done before, we are going to make muffin recipes but we are going to make some of the different ones we have among us, ones that are institutional in nature and worthy of being picked up by professional chefs.  You can always whip out your pocket calculators and break them down but that can be tricky at times, too.  Chefs should NOT break down some recipes whereas we build others up from the ground by installments.  The tricky thing in increasing recipes is that some things must be divided before being increased like salt as something like this base ingredient can become overpowering if not broken down before being multiplied.  Professional bakers know how to do this in their sleep whereas home bakers have to feel their way around.  Besides, who at home—unless running a business out of their house!—would need to make 150 muffins?  If that is what you are doing, running a business, you need to be very careful, get all of the permits, and bring in professional cleaners to keep everything on the up-and-up OR go to jail!

Here is our recipe:

(#0001) ORIGINAL BRAN MUFFIN RECIPE—INSTITUTIONAL SIZE


I began baking early in my career but did not begin designing my own recipes until about five years into it.  This bran muffin recipe is one of the best ones I have ever made, seen, tasted, or served anywhere in the numerous places in which wise owners employed me.  You are going to love this recipe; it is one of the absolute best bran muffins ever made by any human being alive or dead!

Yield:  170 small (0.25-cup size) / Mis-en-place: ONE hour:


Qty.
Measure
Item
Other
1
Quart
Bob’s Red Mill whole-wheat bran
1
Quart
Boiling water
1.25
Quarts
Granulated sugar
3
Cups
Vegetable oil
8
Large
AA eggs
2
Quarts
Buttermilk
.25
Cup
Vanilla extract
.25
Cup
Minced orange
2
Quarts
All-purpose flour
2
Cups
Rice flour
1/3
Cup
Baking soda
.125
Cup
Baking powder
1-1/3
Tablespoons
Salt
2
Quarts
Raisins or chopped dates
2
Quarts
Bran flakes cereal


Method:

1.     Mis-en-place: have everything ready with which to work! First, prepare your muffin cups by selecting nothing but stainless steel or aluminum reflective bakeware as you want to deflect heat away from the baking muffins rather than having them absorbing it—this is imperative to the success of the formula.  Spray them heavily with PAM Baking Spray or Crisco Pan Release or some such other food release spray, then line them with paper or aluminum baking cups, and finally, spray both the tops of the pans and the liners themselves with food release, too; set aside.

2.     Preheat standard oven to 350°F or a convection oven to 300°F (fan “off” for now).  Place a pot of boiling water atop the stove and have ready.  Hook up your Hobart mixer and attach the PADDLE attachment to it.  Add the whole-wheat bran to the mixer and then add the required amount of boiling water to it, rotating the implement slowly around the mixing bowl, for about 1-2 minutes; then, turn off the machine and allow the bran to hydrate.

3.     Meanwhile, have the rest of the ingredients ready to go.  After a few minutes, begin adding the remaining ingredients one-by-one until you have liquefied the mixture in bowl.  Do it this way: (1) sugar, (2) vegetable oil; (3) eggs; (4) buttermilk; (5) vanilla extract; and (6) minced orange and then STOP.

4.     Now, double-sift the remaining ingredients: the two flours, baking soda, baking powder, and the salt.  Force any clumps of soda or powder through a fine mesh screen to eliminate them.  Then, stir in the raisins or dates and the cereal. 

5.     Now, add the DRY ingredients to the WET using the least amount of slow speed paddle rotations around the bowl—the mixture at this point is liquid.  Stop, cover the bowl with plastic wrap, and allow it to rest for 20 minutes undisturbed.  When time is up, stir the batter, scraping down the sides of the bowl and the paddle, and then using an ice cream scoop, and fill the cups to their rims.   If you have any empty cups, fill them halfway with boiling water. 

6.     Place the pans onto the middle oven racks avoiding the TOP and BOTTOMS, using only the middle three racks.  If using the convection oven, flip the fan switch ON now.  Bake approximately 20-25 minutes or until the middle rows of muffins—when pierced with a paring knife or a toothpick withdraws CLEAN.  Then, remove the pans from the oven and place atop cooling racks. 

7.     After 1-2 minutes, begin de-panning the muffins: first gently rap the corners of each muffin pan on the side of the counter, and then gently lift them up out of the cups.  This is where the heavy spray of food release spray simplifies this very important task, as there is NOTHING worse than wasting a dozen or more muffins because they stick to the pans.  In professional foodservice, EVERY single muffin has value and we do NOT waste even one!

8.     Bakers design muffins such as these to fill several needs: (1) you can keep them warm in a bun-warming drawer or (2) you can serve them on decorative trays lined with doilies in the dining room for Sunday brunch, Easter, Mother’s Day, or any special occasion of the year.  Always wrap leftovers in plastic wrap, then in Ziploc freezer bags and FREEZE, never refrigerate as the latter dries them out due to little or no humidity.  If to be used within 24 hours, it is okay to keep them out at room temperature (wrapped, of course) unless you have summer temperatures in the nineties or higher.  Always freeze leftovers but use for best results within 5-7 days; after that toss them out and start anew.

These classic bran muffins are one of the best I have ever designed and the best thing of it is you can use them for virtually anything.  Keep this recipe on hand, as you are going to use it repeatedly. 

One thing I need to say about this recipe is that this one is one of the first we ever did here at the American Institute of Culinary Politics-Elemental News of the Day and is a parent of many different offshoots, hybrids, and variations, all of which are extremely good and which can be found by sorting through the tags.  Overall, we do our best to make things accessible to you, our very dear readers!

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OVER-NITE SENSATION

As always, we have a great time around here and that is why we want all of you to become a part of the organization by submitting articles to us for inspection and full-credit.  It is a great thing if you would do this, as it is a symbiotic relationship: we give you the space to share your recipes and in return, you send us more and more people who will become dedicated followers of the END.  Currently of multi-diversity across the Internet, it is important that we hear the voices of more and more people from all walks of the foodservice profession —join us. We urge our readership to write to us, leave comments, and if there are any of you, who would care to write an article for us, please get in touch via Magnolia Hilltop Brewers, P.O. Box 20669, Bakersfield, CA 93390-0669.  We obviously do not pay anything but give YOU full byline and that, my friends, is worth its weight in gold.  We want as many people who want to write to be able to do so and we believe that by presenting a forum for our fellow chefs, we are doing something for our beloved industry.  We love diversity and hope to add new and different authors to our pantheon of chefs, food and beverage directors, and culinary professionals.  Come on and join us, it will be fun! Expect that when all of us have run through our cycle, we will be introducing some brand-new talent or so Stinky says.
APOSTROPHE

          We have touted the AARC Technology Company here in Bakersfield, CA, and must add the Nerds on Call.com folks.  Without them keeping our blog up-and-running, there is no telling where we would be now.  We have a great many problematic issues here at the AICP-END because even with the best security systems in the world, malware and other terrible fecal materials manage to penetrate the blogsite.  Do yourself a favor, hire the best, and note, you can have online help via a remote button on your desktop for just $25 per month!  Get in contact with the Nerds now!
ROXY AND ELSEWHERE

          We are selling recipes all the time and you can order things you would like copies of simply by mailing us your name, address, the recipe you would like and a check for $1.00.  You can buy an entire week’s worth of recipes when we do a series simply by sending us a check or money order (no cash please!) for $20 and we will have it out to you in the next day’s mail.  Please become a part of the AICP-END by sending us your names, addresses, and information and we will welcome all of you with open arms!              
ONE SIZE FITS ALL

          To buy paintings, recipes, or full article series, please send us your information by mailing us at 10001 Camino Media #20669, Bakersfield, CA, 93311-1310.  You can call about paintings at 661-834-5185; we will take all calls and provide to you as much information as is available.  It is time that we begin taking the next step and to immortalize Beverly Carrick for eternity and begin moving towards the establishment of a website of our own! God bless each single one of you amongst our fan base!       
BONGO FURY

          Our esteemed board of directors here at the American Institute of Culinary Politics-Elemental News of the Day as you know has its headquarters in Oildale, California.  Most of us make the journey here at least once to twice during the year so we can participate in the business end of the blogsite as well as sit in on the important meetings that take place here virtually every week.  One of the things that the BOD has decided in its infinite wisdom is to begin pushing for the removal of the vociferous loudmouth ignoramus, Ralph Bailey, a radio talk show host at AM 1560 Radio in Kern County and someone whom I have had the misfortune of listening to while here in town.  I must say, I cannot imagine how the locals feel about listening to a man with a grade school education discuss sports and politics when he butchers the names of the individuals.  For instance, the big fool continues calling Colin Kaepernick “Copernicus,” a Dark Ages astronomer.  It is not only tiresome, it is ignorant, and I am on board with the removal of this man from the airwaves.  Please, NEW management of the radio station, please fire this dumb loudmouthed bore, it is not only distracting to listen to someone peddle false information but quite another to listen to a racist who goes on and on about “black folks.”  Are we all NOT one people, the American people?  I challenge him to submit a blogpost in which he explains his ignorance of the facts and asks forgiveness of the good people of your very lovely county.  In Seattle, we have AM 570 KVI that hosts the Bryan Suits Show, a man with more Mojo on his stick than Ralph Bailey has in his entire body.  I think Mr. Bailey should take a moment out of his worthless day of wandering the streets of Bakersfield, invading one cocktail lounge after another and actually do some serious studying as to how actually to run a proper radio talk show.  AM 1560, please fire this bozo before he drags your station down into the crapper!                                                                    
ZOOT ALLURES

Anyhow, let us close with this impassioned plea—please leave some comments and/or become a follower and why not spend some money and purchase an album by Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention and/or buy a cookbook from Amazon.com—we want to make some money here so help us out by buying something!  Allied with them, we are pleased to market their merchandise!  Amazon.com is one of the greatest—if not the ultimate greatest!—online department stores in which, one can find almost everything on the planet.  We love them and they love us and we want all of you to visit them daily, take advantage of their deals on everything from kitchen equipment to cookbooks, CDs, DVDs, and everything else a person could want.  Everything you buy from them puts money into our pockets, which allows us to keep this fine blog up-and-running 24/7/365!  God bless America and God bless Amazon.com!

Thank you!

V. Gdansk

V. Gdansk

Cook IV, CWC, ACF, and the Washington State Chef’s Association


This is me back in the 1980's when I was the Executive Chef at a country club in the Napa Valley. I spent many years working in foodservice, having begun as a young boy working for my father in his restaurant over on the coast in Pismo Beach. Foodservice is in my blood and it's something I still do actively every day in my late eighties in Washington State.

Chef Vladimir Gdansk writes from Mukilteo, Washington.

---30---

The END Commentary for Monday, February 11, 2013 by Chef Vladimir Gdansk



Please note that everyone who writes for the Elemental News of the Day is their own person entitled to their own opinions, attitudes, and insanity so does not necessarily speak for all of us.  Thanks, Stinkbug.

REFERENCES:

The one-and-only Chef Vladimir Gdansk wrote this original essay.


Recipe created by Chef Vladimir Gdansk on June 16, 1982 in Mukilteo, Washington.

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This is #0115, a 24” x 36" original oil painting by Beverly Carrick entitled, “Rainy Afternoon." It is among her more beautiful works and is available for sale. You can see much more of her work at her Website, located at http://www.beverlycarrick.com or at Brian Carrick's Facebook page. At her Website, you will see not only more original oil paintings but also lithographs, giclees, prints, miniatures, photographs, and even her award-winning instructional video entitled, "Painting the Southwest with Beverly Carrick." Beverly has been painting for more than 60 years and known around the world for both the beauty and timelessness of her artworks. Hanging in private and public galleries and followed by many fans encircling the globe—her works instill awe because of her artistic brilliance and personal beauty. We urge you to go to her Website NOW and view her work. It is possible that you will find something you like and will want to buy it for yourself, a friend, a loved one, or a neighbor! You will not be disappointed so please: do yourself a favor and go there IMMEDIATELY! Thank you, the Elemental News of the Day!

Beverly Carrick: the World’s Greatest Artist (1927-2012)!

Pictures #0000-0395










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NOTE: EVERYONE WHO WRITES FOR THE ELEMENTAL NEWS OF THE DAY DOES SO UNDER AN ALIAS DUE TO FREQUENT OPINIONS THAT MIGHT NOT ALWAYS BE ACCEPTABLE AT THEIR PLACES OF EMPLOYMENT. PLEASE NOTE, TOO, THAT RECIPES ARE BROKEN DOWN FROM INSTITUTIONAL SIZES, WHICH MEANS THEY DO NOT ALWAYS TRANSLATE PROPERLY AND SEEN AS SUCH.  THANK YOU, Moses Scharbug III.




The above icon is the “Trademark of Quality and Symbol of Integrity/Logo” of the Magnolia Hilltop Brewers and of What's Cookin' Productions. This article is copyrighted © 02-05-2013, all rights reserved. Unauthorized reproductions of anything on this blog site, including written material and photographs, are permissible unless granted in writing by Moses Scharbug or Stinkbug. Thank you, the Elemental News of the Day.

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NOTE—WE SUPPORT JAZ MCKAY AND MR. PUCK OF KNZR 1560 A.M. RADIO IN BAKERSFIELD, CA, BECOMING A SYNDICATED, NATIONWIDE RADIO SHOW! THE MAN IS ONE OF THE ALL-TIME GREATS AND DESERVES TO BE RECOGNIZED FOR HIS CONTRIBUTIONS TO TALK RADIO, THE CONSERVATIVE CAUSE, AND PLAIN COMMON SENSE! THANK YOU!










CHEF VLADIMIR GDANSK
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Thank you for joining me today at the New Elemental News of the Day, I appreciate your company and hope that you bring your friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, and relatives the next time you visit!





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The Chef’s Culinary Nightmare: Our Muse…




  

Beverly Carrick Original Paintings Price List:


  1. Size 36” x 72”…………………………………………………………. $18,000.00.
  2. Size 40” x 60”…………………………………………………………. $15,450.00.
  3. Size 36” x 48”…………………………………………………………. $11,500.00.
  4. Size 30” x 40”…………………………………………………………. $ 9,900.00.
  5. Size 24” x 48”…………………………………………………………. $ 9,000.00.
  6. Size 24” x 36”…………………………………………………………. $ 8,240.00.
  7. Size 24” x 30”…………………………………………………………$ 7,600.00.
  8. Size 20” x 24”…………………………………………………………$ 5,950.00.
  9. Size 18” x 24”…………………………………………………………$ 5,950.00.
  10. Size 16” x 20”…………………………………………………………$ 5,400.00.
  11. Size 12” x 24” …....................................................................................$ 5,400.00.
  12. Size 12” x 16”….....................................................................................$ 4,500.00.
  13. Size 11” x 14”…………………………………………………………$ 4,500.00.
  14. Size 9” x 12” …………………………………………………………. $ 1,200.00.
  15. Size 8” x 10” …………………………………………………………. $ 1,000.00.



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